Cravings

In Eating the Angel Way, Annie asked (among other things) what do you do about cravings?

There have been times in my life when I have had a box of Wedding Cookies, a large bag of peanut M & M's & a quart of ice cream on my bed behind my closed door, as I tried to make myself feel better. Other times there have been extra-large bags of Cheetos, pasta with mayonnaise (what?), & a bag of jelly beans.

I think I ate in secret, not because I was ashamed, but because I didn't want to share. When we were kids, Mom would divide the cookies into three boxes so my brother & sister & I wouldn't fight over them. Until she did that, I'd eat what I could before anyone else could get it, like a starved dog or a child of the street. Even though I knew there would always be more (no matter what Mom threatened.) It didn't make sense.

I makes less sense now that I buy the groceries and don't have to ask anyone or answer to anyone (shut up Bob, I'll eat as much ice cream as I freakin' want).

Then there were the days of diets, when I would not allow myself to eat certain things. Dry salads, toast with a teaspoon of peanut butter, a single hamburger patty with NOTHING. I shudder to think. And of course, the inevitable moment when I'd just go ahead and scarf the entire bag of crunchy Cheetos.

So now that I'm grown up (shut up!) I don't d-word. I don't have bad foods. I don't hoard food (no matter what anyone may think of the Pepperidge Farms macadamia nut cookies in my bra drawer --- hey! It's Pepperidge Farms. I bought the kids Oreos.) Any way... back to cravings.

On a side note... what's with these magazines and their "healthy substitutions"?

• Instead of an Extra Large Snickers Candy Bar, have a jelly bean, save a gazillion calories.
• Instead of scallops & shrimp with alfredo sauce and fettuccine, have a rice cake with plain tuna.
• Instead of homemade coffee ice cream, have a whole wheat cracker.

What the ??????

What I do now is think about my cravings. Do I want something sweet? Chocolate or jelly bean sweet? Salty or spicy? Crunchy or smooth? I spend a good bit of time imagining eating food, to figure out what it is that I really really want.

So, no, a whole wheat cracker won't do if I want a gallon of coffee ice cream. But a small cup might do. And a low-fat latte might also, but why bother? And if I want sour cream, I eat sour cream, but not a whole carton.

If I know what sensation I want, I can figure out how to get it without breaking the calorie bank, or my stomach. And so I don't do the serial binge... do I want chocolate? *Eat a Snickers* nope. do I want salty? *eat a bag of chips* nope. do I want creamy? *eat a jar of mayonnaise (What?)* oh yeah, that was it.

I still may eat for the wrong reasons. I still eat what I don't really want because it's there. Or on television. But at least I think about it.